When Megan Saunders graduates from Kentridge High School on Saturday, an important person in her life won’t be there to share the moment.

Saunders’ father, James Saunders, a Washington State Patrol trooper, was shot and killed conducting a traffic stop in Pasco in 1999. Megan Saunders was 2½ at the time.

“Growing up without him was really difficult,” she said. “Milestones, especially like coming up on gradation, are really difficult because you see other people with their dads. Growing up, I would miss out on Father’s Day or father-daughter dances.”

Saunders doesn’t remember a lot about her father, but her mother, Billie, tries to keep him a part of the family. Billie Saunders was pregnant when her husband was killed. Megan Saunders’ brother, Jim, is a freshman at Kentridge.

“It is so hard for her, but she does a lot to keep him alive to us,” Saunders said of her mom. “She tells us stories and just little funny things. In certain circumstances she says, ‘That reminds me so much of your dad.'”

Saunders said her father’s friends and colleagues also help keep his memory alive.

“My Washington State Patrol family is really strong, and a lot of times I associate his memory with them. Some of them will actually be attending the graduation, so that is really special to me,” she said.

Saunders is involved with the Washington State Patrol Memorial Foundation and attends an annual dinner for families of fallen troopers.

“Just being around them (other survivors) and being able to talk to them is really helpful for both sides because we can tell our stories and they can tell theirs,” she said.

Saunders has become more comfortable talking about her father. It was a part of her senior presentation and has been a topic of papers for some of her English classes.

“When I was little I didn’t like to tell people, and it took me a long time to get over where I wouldn’t tell people,” she said. “People would say, ‘What does your dad do?’ It really hurt me.”

Talking and writing about her father have been helpful to Saunders.

“I feel like even though people don’t understand, it is best that they know just because they can understand where I am coming from,” she said. “My dad’s death doesn’t define me. Obviously, it has shaped me to become the person I am today.”

Although Saunders only knew her father for a short time, he still had a profound impact on her.

“He was such a positive influence in my life, especially in my formidable years,” she said. “He taught me a lot. In the pictures and in the little home videos, he is reading to me and he is playing with me, and I feel like that really shaped who I am today. I love literature. I love writing, and then even after his death I feel like writing became and outlet for me. I’d write in my diary a lot. I would write stories.”

Saunders has considered writing a book about her experiences.

“The coolest thing about doing that would be that other kids could be able to read it, and other kids who maybe would have the same experiences could sort of connect and relate,” she said.

Saunders plans to attend the University of Washington in the fall. She hasn’t decided on a major yet but is considering communications or something related to writing.

Saunders has learned a lot from the loss of her father.

“Cherish everybody around you because you don’t know,” she said. “Life is short. And also enjoy life. There’s so many things in life that happen that are bad that if you focus on those bad things, you’re not going to have a fulfilled life. You are not going to be happy with yourself and with others around you, so you might as well live a fulfilled life while you can.”